The task ahead of us is NEVER as GREAT as the power behind us!!

As promised here is my goals for the next 30 days, but first as I was sitting at the laundry mat I got a feeling and just starting writing...sometimes I do my best writing there... I don't understand....but here is a part of what I wrote...promise I won't share the full FOUR pages!!  :-)
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7-8-12
Well another 2 months has come and went (since I wrote in my journal) ~ as well as another birthday!  Some days I just wonder if I'm meant to be just going through the motions or if I'm meant for something so much greater and so much better.  But if I don't change my attitude or my life then do I really deserve something better? I mean I've had a bad 18 months but why am I letting that define me?  Some people think I need to go seek help but how can I get help from someone that doesn't know what I'm going through?  My mom said drugs are wonderful ~ but I don't want feel drugs are going to make a difference or even make Jane and William come back!  That's all I want!  I want my my normal life back!  I want my motivation (which was Jane) back!  I want my life back!

Today is the day I will try my best to start living for me!  I have out line my work out plan for the next 30 days!  My morning work outs to my evening work outs! My food journal or plan is next!  I need to get my food in check and I will need to start getting healthy and learn to handle my stress a lot better.  Sitting at home is not cutting it anymore.  I'm not setting a weight loss goal only because I know if I focus on the healthy things that the weight will naturally come off!

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WOW... can't believe I just shared my thoughts and feelings....people that know me really well, know that a lot of what I just wrote is personal.  But maybe it's time to get the truth out there....maybe this is what I need to keep me on track.... this way it's made public and now I know I have others holding me accountable for my actions.  I don't know what it honestly means other than I know someone else is out there going through the same thing and maybe they will find some motivation or help knowing someone else feels their pain and is walking their same path.

So my goal and my "schedule" is as follows and yes it may change a little bit, but I have 37 work outs planned for the next 30 days (starting Monday).... along with my 30 day water challenge that my friend challenged me too!  :-O  (this is just drinking water for the next 30 days... no tea, no soda no NOTHING other than the God given H2O!)

Monday: 5am walk on my treadmill (at least 2 miles)
              6pm ZUMBA

Tuesday: 5am walk on my treadmill (at least 2 miles)
               6pm coaching and maybe a class after (coaching is the easy part not much activity)

Wednesday: 5:30am cyclates (this is 30 minutes Cycling and 30 minutes Pilate's)
                    6pm ZUMBA

Thursday: 5am walk on my treadmill (at least 2 miles)
                6pm coaching and maybe a class after (with her mom)

Friday: 5:30 Cyclates (same as above)
            PM.... I'M OFF!!!!!  :-)

Saturday: 9am ZUMBA

Sunday: OFF so that means POOL TIME!!!!!!  (gotta start dreaming of my bikini!)

Yes, some may say this is too much, but honestly..... I see a lot of fun in this schedule (that's the Zumba and maybe watching a movie while on my treadmill!).  The only class or activity that I see is going to be out of my comfort zone is the Cyclelates.  Not only b/c I'm not a fan of cycling.... (only b/c do fluffy people cycle?!?!?) but Pilate's....and having the feeling that I am going to be the only FAT person in exercise class!  That is always my biggest fear!  But, the only way to get to my goal of being healthy and happy is MAKING THE FIRST STEP!  So tomorrow.... I will make MY FIRST STEP!!!

WISH ME LUCK!
Kimberly

Thoughts and maybe logic......

Well.... as I sit here all nasty and sweaty I look back to how my day went.  It sure didn't start the way I had envisioned or hoped it would...... I didn't get out of bed until 7:15 and I have to be to work at 8am!!  :(  So needless to say the "new year" isn't off to a very swell start.... but this weekend my goal is to PLAN my journey.... I'm going to map out what I am going to eat and when I am going to work out and where.  I am going to start taking a cycling class that also does Pilate's (30 minutes of each) 2 days a week and then Zumba 2 days a week and coach basketball 2 days a week..... and then take a class with her mom 1 day a week.... sounds like a lot....but I think some of it would be considered FUN!  Yes, I said working out is FUN..... take today for instance; my boss left work at 4:30 and I was shortly behind at 4:45.  I knew I was coaching tonight at 5:30 and if I was going to go home I would NOT get back out (even though I live 2 blocks from the gym!) and so I went and WORKED OUT!!! I got a 30 minute bike ride in BEFORE I coached!!!  And let me tell you that actually felt good.  That is the first time I have worked out since surgery... yeah, I did a walking group, but I busted it on the bike..... I wouldn't let my RPM's (whatever those are) go below 90!!!!  Then after I really wanted to do the UBE (some arm bike thing) and I did about 4 minutes and was done.... the thing wasn't really working....  :-(  But I did instead of going to Burger King and McDonald's (passed them both) I went to SUBWAY..... and that actually got me thinking even more...... why is it that when you work out you eat better????  Seriously..... McDonald's would have been cheaper and so would Burger King, but after busting my butt I didn't feel like putting that in my body..... I just don't understand...

Anyway... Expect my goals and my plans by the end of the weekend and I'm sure I will be packing my gym bag for some time at the gym yet again tomorrow.  I kind of like the way I feel tonight!!!  (other than hot and sweaty!)


Have a great evening!!!!
Kimberly